Friday, March 5, 2010

Ask Me Your Questions, I'll Tell You Few Lies

Since the name of this blog is “Karisa Tells All,” I think I should do a little bit more telling, don’t you think? So I’d like to announce that the phone lines (er, comments section) are now open for your questions. Ask me anything you want to know: stuff about me, stuff about you, psychic predictions, philosophical queries, facts you’re too lazy to google, advice, etc. If you send me a question I will post it on the blog (anonymously if you’d like) along with my answer. Here are some example questions I have received in the past:


Q: How many licks does it take till you get to the center of the uhh uhhhhhhh?

A: A one, a two, a thrrreeeee.


Q: What is the meaning of life?

A: shut up


Q: Should I ask out that boy in my algebra class, or should I have a solitary Pauly Shore marathon instead?

A: Neither. Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie.


“Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May but thy eternal summer shall not fade,” -Cliff’s Notes


Q: What would Jesus do?

A: Walk on water, among other things.


Q: How should I go about finding myself?

A: Locate a mirror. Stand in front of it. Gaze at your reflection for a while. Lift up your right index finger and point at your reflection such that your reflection also points at you. Then say “I am there. There I am.”


Q: Why don’t I have any money?

A: Because you spent it all on orchids.


Q: What’s wrong with being a hipster?

A: Mustache.


Plus everything else about you.


Q: Why can’t I be America’s next Top Model?

A: I’d need to see a picture to be sure, but you are either too ugly or not ugly enough.


Q: Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?

A: Unlike me, they long to be close to you.


Q: What’s the best usage for a wheel of cheese?

A: Keep it as a spare in case you drive over a nail. Do not, under any circumstances, eat anything that can be described as a wheel.


So you can see by my past experiences doling out answers that I am a wise, virtuoso question-answerer and I have only your best interests in mind. So send in your questions and I’ll be sure to post them! You can submit them in the comments below or email them to ktell16@gmail.com

3 comments:

  1. Will the Cubs win it all this year?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ha ha! You've got an awesome blog!

    Mmmm.... what inspires you?!

    Have a fab week, *I'll be back*

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  3. Do I still hold the rank for being the least able to made awkward by things? And are you still the most able? If you have changed, how? hahaha

    ReplyDelete

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