Monday, January 11, 2010

6 ways of writing a blog entry

So I decided to start up a blog. I've gone down the Xanga road and dipped my toes into the world of LiveJournal, but today I decided to break out the big guns, go for broke, go big or go home, and get a real blog. What makes this blog more "real," you ask? I suppose it's the server (host? domain name? I don't know computers [or animals]). Something about Xanga just screams "idiot with an internet connection."

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The computer don't lie, buddy.

And Livejournal screams (in three part harmony) "idiot with an internet connection and a razor blade."

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Like this guy, only with a blog instead of a regime.

But Blogger (Blogspot? Again, I don't know computers) is the blog of the stars! First of all, it seems to be run by Google (again with the computers...) which is like the Lady Gaga of search engines. Second of all, almost every blog in my reader (my Google reader) is run by Blogger. Third of all...meh, I've got nothing--but I generally like to have three main points because I'm an English major who can't...get...past...the 5 paragraph essay.

This little internal debate got me thinking about blog stereotypes (how funny that such a thing did not even exist last time we changed decades). I decided there are really only about 6 different types of blogs:

6 Ways of Writing a Blog Entry

1. The “Why do I not own this overpriced piece of hipster art I found on etsy?” blog.

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"Oh my, it's just so adorable and sweet! I can think of so many different uses for it, too! Eek, I die. I die!"

2. The “Look what I made all by myself!” blog.
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"It was really quite time-consuming and frustrating, but I am sooo happy with how it turned out and can't wait to see everyone's reaction when I wear it to LARPing practice tomorrow."

3. The "I went abroad for the semester or did something else equally eye-opening and decided to share my travails and triumphs with the homies back home" blog.
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"Just got here yesterday and I am soooo tired! First we checked into the hotel, and haha we saw the bidet in the bathroom---culture shock! Then we went to dinner at this pub where we had these little tiny hamburgers with "chips" haha and we got to ride one of those double-decker buses. Tomorrow we're going to visit Big Ben and London Bridge andddhnj oh sorry I just fell asleep."

4. The “Hey, everyone else was doing it. How does this thing even work?” blog.
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"Hey everyone! I just started a blog, lol I know right? I don't know how to change the font on this thing. How do I see my post when I'm done? Oh well, I'm probably not going to is this very much anyway."

5. The “I just had this totally, totally deep thought that I wanted to share: what if my version of blue is different from yours? And there’s no way for us to ever know?” blog.
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"I had this totally trippy dream last night, and it really made me think about life, and the world, and human nature, you know? Like, we're all...here, and yet none of us is really, actually here. It's so philosophical haha!"

6. And worst of all, the “OMGGG my life sux no1 understandz me and my ripped jeans” blog.
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"Ugh my mom is such a b!&@$. I told her I was going to a show tonight and she was like, 'what, the movies?' and I was like 'no, a show, idiot.' And she was like 'what, a concert?' And I was like 'no, a show.' Oh Em Gee get me out of this hellhole. Here are some song lyrics to help assuage the pain."


Hopefully this blog will not just fit neatly into one of these categories. I'm hoping to hit up all the stereotypes, with a heavy emphasis on number 6 (sarcasm noted). Sometimes I'll share cool/funny/amazing things I find around the web, but hopefully a mustache on a stick will never again make a cameo on this blog. I also will show you guys stuff I make because I like to make stuff but I am neither prolific nor talented, so maybe this blog will help me in that area. As far as type 3, I don't really do anything interesting, but maybe I'll find a way to wax poetic about the banalities of my daily existence anyway. Type 4 is a given. If I delve into #5 and 6 too much, then...I don't care because this is my blog and I can do whatever I want!

On that note, no one understands me wahhhh.

3 comments:

  1. I was just looking back at the beginning of this particular blog of mine, and its pretty funny because I too started it on my last semester of college... life is funny :)

    (PS I would LOVE it if you followed me, and commented on anything I ever wrote on this blog because NOBODY reads it. lol)

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  2. Hahaha. You know this is actually a very funny post.

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  3. Hahaha, this truly is funny. MY first blog post is so not like this, mine was horrible!

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